By Kevin D. Klipstein, President & Chief Executive Officer

The start of a typical Wednesday night league match for me sounds like this after the warm-up:

Me: 鈥淒o you have your eye guards? In case I accidentally hit you, I don鈥檛 want you to get hurt.鈥�
Opponent: 鈥淯h, no, you won鈥檛 hit me/I don鈥檛 have any/didn鈥檛 bring them/don鈥檛 wear them.鈥�
Me: 鈥淥K, I have an extra pair鈥�
Opponent: 鈥淯hh鈥︹��
Me: (upon pulling the extra set of eyewear out of my pocket) 鈥淗ere you go.鈥�
Opponent: (holding up his hand as if to stop traffic) 鈥淣o, really, I don鈥檛 wear them.鈥�
Me: 鈥淵ou have to, it鈥檚 a requirement for participating in the league.鈥�
Opponent: (glares at me)
Me: 鈥淚鈥檓 the CEO of 黑料不打烊, I won鈥檛 play you if you don鈥檛 wear them.鈥�
Opponent: 鈥淯rgh鈥� (looking unimpressed, takes the eyewear, cleans them a few times with shirt, squints through lenses while looking up at the lights, shakes head a few times, picks up ball and pounds a few rails much harder than he was during the warm-up).
Me: 鈥淩eady? Want to spin?鈥�

Notes: Name of Opponent was not used to protect the guilty. The author usually wins the first game, though he has yet to win a league match this season鈥�

If reading this issue does not convince adults to act like grown-ups when it comes to eye protection on the squash court, I鈥檓 not sure anything will.